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 Or the teenage angst…usually followed with rampant mood swings, foot stomping and incessant eye rolls which then turn into the ever so lovely yelling of “I KNOW MOM” or “GOD” or “IT’S MY BUSINESS”. Payback. Every time I see one of my kids doing this…I think of my mother. “You wait until you have kids.” Payback.
I guess this teenage rebellion thing is just a process of life. It is what it is…then if so, why do we expect our teenage Diabetic child to not follow suit? (from now on forward teenage also includes pre-teens) Honestly, just because they have diabetes doesn’t mean they will then in turn not rebel. I see on blogs all the time how parents are surprised. I was one of them a few years back. “Aw come one, this isn’t a game. How could she not test? How could she just take shots blindly? Doesn’t she know what could happen?” The answer is a resounding YES, they know what could happen. But it aint gunna happen to them.
Sometimes I think it would just be easier to revert back to how our parents handled things. Things were the way they were because “they said so”. We spend a lot of time saying don’t do this, because this will happen…and for us…10 times out of 10 it never happens. Which is the goal, right? Except for the fact that your child starts to develop a sense of my mother has absolutely no clue what she is talking about.
I remember a few years back when Kelsey was not testing her blood sugar at all at school and having a conversation with her about the differences between letting highs go untreated and having lows. One is fast and will knock you on your butt and the other is slow, it’s sneaky..and before you know it it’s too late. However, that just doesn’t hit home. It’s unfortunate, but as a teenager if it’s not now at this very second, it doesn’t compute. So, what we ended up doing is just checking her meter. Reasoning didn’t work, facts do. You don’t test, you don’t have privileges. It would be nice to have a child that is able to understand things happen logically, but come on…I am pretty sure I am asking WAY too much of my teenager. So, we just start speaking in a language both my kids understand. FREEDOM. Freedom, freedom, freedom. “Ya want it? Ya earn it!” It’s a little better than “because I said so..” but in the end it gains the same results.
As D-parents there are a few extra added steps in watching over your teenager. All parents of teenagers have to be dillegent. We just have a few more things to worry about. But in the end, we have to understand they are teenagers and they are just going to do stupid stuff. So, I say… expect it. Head it off at the pass, so you are ready when it happens. Please don’t think because your child is ‘lovely and compliant now means they will always be that way. They WILL fight back. So, again, just expect it. Maybe even break out the standard “because I said so” if you have to. In the end, our responsibility is to teach them responsibility and to keep them safe. Sometimes that involves making mistakes. So, if you are prepared..hopefully those will be minimised and then met with fain interest, eye rolling and stomping off to their room.
I read two posts last week that made me both laugh and cry. I had been in similar situations as these and both situations were wrapped up neatly with a supportive family member.
Meri over at Our Diabetic Life, litterally had me in stitches. I am pretty sure that wasn’t how it was intended, but I had SO been there and DONE that. I saw myself in her words. Meri has 3 Diabetic children and has been doing the mommy balance of trying to let her eldest son take over some of his diabetes responsibilities while still keeping an eye on things. She found out that he was, well, blowing it all off and was sent into a tail spin. She couldn’t beleive it and went pretty much went into a rant in the middle of a restaurant. This is about where I went into fits. Because she was in the middle of her crazy, hands waving, full on fit when her husband calmly sat her down and put things right again. (I can’t find the exact blog post, so Meri if you are reading this can you send it to me so I can share it with my lovely readers???). I can’t tell you how many times I have been on the rage (where you know you are throwing a fit, you know everyone else knows you are throwing a fit, but you keep throwing it anyhow) only to have my supportive husband set it straight. I usually fight back, unlike Meri, but we both still know he is right.
Another post I read last week was over at Diabetes Sweeties. Kacey had been counting her carbs pretty consistently and Mom decided she could handle things on her own this time. Why should tonight be any different than when she is hovering? Ended up that Kacey miscounted and didn’t take enough insulin. She had a meltdown right then and there. I know, I know…not enough insulin no big deal…but I have to say, it’s kind of cool that she thinks enough of it to be upset about making a mistake. The decision was made that Kacey couldn’t have ice cream, so her sister joined her as well as the rest of the family and they all went without ice cream that night.
I read quite a few blogs every day. My favorite posts are ones where the family steps in and helps out. These above don’t seem like much, but think about it if Meri didn’t have a calming husband to bounce things off of…think about how Kacey would have felt if she had to watch her family eat ice cream while she went without. It’s the little things that if are ignored or allowed to fester turn into big things later in life. Having a supportive family makes all the difference in the world when the D is involved. Whether you have one person or an entire brood of diabetics in your family, try and be as supportive as possible. Whether you understand what they are going through or agree with how they handle things…really doesn’t matter. All you need to to is show them that you are there for them 100%. Laugh with them, love them and support them.
Seems like I have been kind of absent that last couple of weeks. I have been doing project work for Media Design School, namely putting together their graduation. It was one of the largest events I had put together and was both fun and stressful. When I was still able to get up at 5:30am my writing time turned into looking for work time…so The DiabeticDuo kind of got put on the back burner.
We didn’t get to do much of what was planned this weekend. Both Marty and I were feeling kind of “pooky”. Well, I am sure mine was just from being exhausted. Marty is actually sick. His blood sugar was crazy all day yesterday. I only gave him incremental overages because I had no idea if they would catch up with him..and if they would be affected by the crossover with Lantus. He slept hard last night. I tested twice and gave him a shot…without him even moving muscle. Today he is doing better. His head is still full and he is having attitude ups and downs, but his blood sugar is in line.
I didn’t have anyone submit for the DFF this past week. Hopefully there will be a submission this week!!
This post is for New Zealand residents.
Paul Forno from Diabetes Supplies Limited is working hard to resurect Diabetes Supplies Limited. Ever since pharma has been able to fulfill your test strip prescription, their business has dwindled. The thing is, 100% of the profits from Diabetes Supplies Limited go directly to Diabetes New Zealand. And since the business had been going South, so have the profits for the organization that oversees Diabetes for this country.
I am a newby here, I didn’t even know we had a choice. I thought you just went the pharmacy to get everything filled. Yeah, it might be a pain to have to ask for a separate test strip prescription from your doctor to send off to Diabetes Supplies Ltd. It might be inconvenient to have to wait a couple of days for the strips to arrive. But I think in the effort of supporting Diabetes New Zealand (DSL), it’s something we will do. After all, some times the right thing isn’t always the easiest thing. And with two diabetic kids. We go through some test strips. (there’s proof of it all over my house….and car…and yard…they pop up everywhere!!)
Here’s some notes directly from Paul himself:
Diabetes Supplies still has some unique advantages over the pharmacy
- We can supply 3 months supply of test strips in one shipment
- We only charge $1.50 , no service fee , weekend fees or public holiday fee and its free to high volume users
- The product is delivered to your door ( free of charge) within 24 hours of DSL receiving the script
- You can mail your script to DSL for free using freepost – FREEPOST DSL ,Diabetes Supplies Limited. P O BOX 54 Oamaru
- You can buy other products at the same time via our catalogue or through the web site
- And most importantly, by you supporting Diabetes Supplies Ltd, you are supporting all people with Diabetes, this is because all profits from Diabetes Supplies Ltd, go straight back to Diabetes New Zealand for use in providing information, education , support and advocacy for all people with Diabetes in New Zealand
So, you save money and effort. You can get all your test strips at once instead of making several trips AND the profits go back to Diabetes New Zealand. Seems like a no brainer to me!! Ask your doctor for a separate prescription and send it to Diabetes Supplies Ltd. at the address above.
It’s funny how the smallest things make your family, well, a family. This weekend I made a meal that made everyone happy. It’s silly, how can a meal make everyone excited? I went shopping early Saturday morning just like I normally do. We are on a really tight budget, so shopping is a real PITA. I mean, I am down to counting how many apples I can buy. Sad, really. However this Saturday I said screw it. I was going to make a meal that would make everyone happy, besides I was just in the mood. When I got home I made bread (after eating an entire tray of pre-peeled and on sale mandarins) and some deviled eggs. That afternoon I served everyone what we like to call a “snacky meal”. We had cut up veges…carrots, peppers, cauliflower, broccoli, cucumber, and tomatoes. I put out hummus and ranch dip, which we have been JONESING for. We can’t get ranch dressing here. Well, I take that back they sell something labeled Ranch…but it’s not Ranch. My mom sent me some dry packets and I whipped it together with some sour cream. You would have thought I put out a tray of chocolate. (the little things, ranch dip!) Then there was a tray of meats and cheeses and lastly my homemade garlic and basil bread with butter. The simplest meal ever, and my family thinks that we have hit the jackpot. Funny how that is.
Another little thing we do is watch movies, just like most families. However, we watch them a bit differently. We mock, joke around, try to figure out where we had seen that actor before. If the movie is good, we are mostly quiet…but if it’s bad or bad acting or even if there is just one bad actor…watch out. It’s on in the Porter house. We spend the entire time making up dialog like in Mystery Science Theater or just giving that bad actor a complete and thorough mocking. I like to think that Mike and I are funny people, but my kids, they are just as funny. Both have quick wit and Marty is starting to develop his comedic timing. Lately he has been taking advantage of actor pauses. For example:
Actor ” You know what I noticed when I looked in the mirror?”
Marty ” What, that you were cross eyed?”
Somehow he manages to slip his comments in before the next line is spoke. Anyhow, yesterday we watched two movies and ended the night with a TV show. We didn’t have enough time to watch another movie before the kids went to bed and we had seen all of our family favorite ghost shows, so we decided to watch a new one. “Extreme Ghost Hunters”. Now if you have watched ghost hunter type shows, you know the bar for “interesting characters” isn’t set very high. But we love the shows, none the less. However on Extreme Ghost Hunters there is one guy on this show that kept us in stitches (never mind the dang title of the show). He is probably a wonderful guy, but just too easy to giggle at when on TV. It ended the night with everyone laughing and having a good time.
Maybe it’s just me, but I went to bed happy last night. It’s so satisfying to know that good food and laughter is all my family needs to feel happy and satisfied.
Don’t forget to submit for the DFF (Diabetic Friend Forever) Contest!! Look for the next story on Tuesday.
The What, When and How
What: Write a story about your DFF, sharing with us the things they do to help make your life a positive one.
When: I will take stories starting today and the contest will end April 2nd. (I couldn’t do the 1st because that’s April Fools Day)
How: Submit you stories to renata@thediabeticduo.com. I will post a “Story” of the week every Tuesday.
I will announce the winner on April 6th along with the winning story.
Good Luck and I can’t wait to read your stories.
Last night, Mike and I went into pure panic mode. Kelsey was an hour late from volleyball practice. She walks home at night and she took a new route that she did explain to me, but I haven’t actually taken the route myself. All I knew was one road name and that it involves crossing through a park. Now before you freak out about the walking home at night, remember we live in New Zealand not the US. It’s very safe here and kids go everywhere on their own. (Even little tiny ones, I remember the day when we first moved here and I saw my first little kid, couldn’t have been more than 5, running down a busy street by themselves….talk about panic attacks…) Anyhow, Kelsey knows she is supposed to test before she leaves practice to walk home but there have been days where she has walked into the house low. Frustrating, yes. But I have to let her make these decisions and deal with them. This fact alone is what caused my panic. I have this fear that one day we are going to find her passed out along the sidewalk. Back to us looking for Kelsey. We hopped in the car and I tried to drive the way she told me. (Note to self, Kelsey has absolutely no sense of direction). We zigged and zagged and worked our way through the streets. Normally she carries the spare cell phone (cell plans are expensive here, so we don’t all have a phone like we had at home), but we misplaced the phone and have been looking for it for the past 3 days. We went back to the school and talked to the security guy. All he had to say was that they closed up at 8pm. It was now 9:15. We frantically texted her friend Hamish and asked him to call me immediately, which he did. (God love him.) We explained the situation and that if we came and got him would he show us the way through the park and he agreed. Just then the phone rang and it was Marty telling us Kelsey was home. HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF, that quickly turned into anger. Long story short:practice ran over, other kids don’t know how to tell time and someone dislocated their wrist. And “I tested before I left, I SWEAR!!!!” Parental Head Slap.
Two things came out of this. 1. “I don’t care where we live, you aren’t crossing through the park after dark.” 2. We tore the house up until we found the phone, which was in her jacket pocket (but she SWORE she gave it back to Dad).
Well, at least there is one person in the public eye who’s not a complete moron when it comes to T1. Actually that sentence was just to get your attention. I am sure there are many notable people who take the time to learn about Diabetes, but this topic is still burning holes in blog screens everywhere. I was reading this Dear Abby letter about parents of two boys. One has T1 and one doesn’t. They restrict the T1’s diet and the question is basically why shouldn’t I let the non diabetic eat ice cream while the other has none?
So, back to my first sentence. At least Dear Abby had some common sense about stating “most people with Type 1 diabetes, while trying to eat healthfully, do not completely deprive themselves of treats but accommodate them by adjusting their level of insulin”. Way to go Abby! You can read her statement here.
There are two things that bother me about the writer’s question. First, as you know I take issue with parents being so strict on their kids diets to the point where it WILL BACKFIRE. We all need to be diligent with our diets, diabetic or not. But restricting foods is going to cause their child to sneak, which is a nightmare chasing a nightmare when trying to correct blood sugar with a food sneaker. It’s also setting the child up to possibly have food issues when they get older. Second, If these parents were actually instructed to behave this way by medical professionals….I would like to wring their necks. My guess is this isn’t true. They probably told the parents to watch the intake, manage it, reduce it…whatever and the parents took it to the extreme. However, I do think the medical professionals should warn about severe restrictions as much as they tell you to be carb conscious. Don’t you think?
Eh, just my two cents.
This DFF letter was written by Chez from Australia. Chez was my first submission for the DFF contest, so I thought it fitting to re-post it for today. This a wonderful story about Chez and her husband and how he has helped not only her through ups and downs, but has helped their child with T1 too. Read On….
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Hi ! I’m an Australian who has lived with type 1 diabetes for more than 37 years since I was a young girl. I am amazed that you’ve not received any DFF stories from this world of people willing to write about anything and everything on the internet so I thought I’d start the ball rolling and let you know about my wonderful husband who has been there for me through thick and thin, highs and lows, hypos and hypers, needles and pumps for many years and is also there for our eldest son who also lives with the dreaded type 1.
John is a busy man as we have a couple of businesses which we now run from home. I have had LOTS of ups and downs with the diabetes over the years and he’s told me some of the dreadful things I’ve said to him when I’ve been in “one of those” hypos where I cannot control what I am saying or doing. I am amazed at times that he doesn’t just leave me in a heap on the floor but he never has and I don’t believe he ever would (well not for that reason anyway . Our precious son who is now 11 years old was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes 03/03/2003 when he was a cute (and healthy) 4 year old. It was a hideous day for us because John and I know what it is like and I know what his future holds if we don’t keep things constantly under control. Diabetes adds a whole new dimension to family life and I know lots of families that it tears apart so I have to be grateful for our John who encourages us to deal with what we have to deal with and get on with it and over it. That’s not always easy and sometimes everything crumbles around us but then we need a strong person to pull it all back together and that is usually John (although I guess I have something to do with that too).
Most of the most evil stuff happened before I got an insulin pump in 2004 but things are still not perfect even with a pump. I deal with hypo unawareness which is when the hypo sneaks up without warning and you’re yelling at your husband and kids like a maniac because they didn’t do some trivial thing and then you somehow through the fog figure something is wrong and hopefully you can manage to do a blood test and find it is really low. Sometimes I can’t even figure out at that stage where the jelly babies are, much less how to put them into my mouth. That’s when I really need a DFF and John is usually the one I depend on. Sometimes one of my sons has to help because John isn’t around so I am grateful to both of them too. I feel bad sometimes when I know I’m yelling at them because of something happening with my blood sugars. I can’t explain it sometimes and I know that I am not a nice person when my reading is around 14-15mmol. I’m just a yuk person sometimes so have to be grateful that there is some understanding in my family that I just can’t help it sometimes.
As a family, we put a lot of effort into raising funds for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation (JDRF) because, after 30 years of figuring I was never going to see anything done to find a cure for type 1 diabetes, I found a website telling me that JDRF was actually putting some effort into funding research that would eventually find a cure for us all. We have stuck closely to JDRF for many years and know they are working in areas that will eventually lead to a cure for us. I just want it to be yesterday so that the pressure of life with type 1 diabetes can be lifted from our family and families all around Australia, New Zealand and the world.
I’d like John to get a break from the extra stresses that it puts on and I’d like us not to need a DFF any longer. I stay ever-hopeful but ever-grateful to my special DFF who I was lucky enough to find and hang on to.
May all those of us with diabetes always have a DFF to take special care of us because sometimes we need special care
Chez
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Send in your DFF story to renata@thediabeticduo.com or post it directly to the site here.
 I was contacted this morning by Sam over at Talking Blood Glucose. She mentioned that she enjoyed reading my blog (which is always AWESOME to hear) and invited me to take a look at hers. I happily wrote her back and said that I would get to it this afternoon and introduce her later in the week. After writing most of my post, I decided to take a break and go ahead and take a peek at Sam’s blog. I have to say, she is doing a series right now that pretty cool. She is using the 7 dwarfs and relating them to the moods and feelings of a diabetic. Today’s post is about “Sneezy” or getting sick. But the one I enjoyed the most is “Bashful”, how do you reveal your diabetes to others. (dang, I wish I had thought of this!!)
Sam is a Type 1 Diabetic who was diagnosed at the age of 8. Now an archaeologist and blogger. My post can wait another day. Spend some time with Sam and reading her 7 Dwarfs series. It’s short, relevant and fun.
DFF (Diabetes Friend Forever)
The stories are starting to come in for DFF. Please send me your story about your Diabetes Friend Forever. I will be posting a story tomorrow for everyone to read. Remember the contest ends April 2nd. You can send them to renata@thediabeticduo.com or you can post it to the first DFF post.
Kids Weekly Numbers
Both kids were kind of high this week. Marty’s numbers averaged out to 10.2/185 and Kelsey’s were 10.7/193. Not bad, but riding higher.
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Disclaimer I am in no way a medical professional. I am, however, a
very experienced parent of two diabetic children. The
content of this blog is only meant to share our life for
those who are looking for support. I can only offer my
experiences, my kids experiences and a shoulder to lean
on. If you are looking for medical advice, please speak to your doctor.
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